Found this old joke. Posted for posterity:
Socialism: You have two cows; you give one to your neighbour.
Communism: You have tow cows; the government takes both and gives you the milk.
Fascism: You have two cows; the government takes both and sells you the milk.
Nazism: You have two cows; the government takes both and shoots you.
Bureaucratism: You have two cows; the government takes both, shoots one, milks
the other and throws the milk away.Capitalism: You have two cows; you sell one and buy a bull.